The Vagaries of Social Media

Lately I’ve had some online friends who decided to pull back and disappear from Facebook, Twitter, Instagram and other social media sites. Most of them cite similar reasons for taking protracted breaks. Reasons include: stress, mental health, disgust, tiredness, lack of fun and time consuming. Ah, the vagaries of social media!

I did not want to be on Facebook but when my first book came out, my publisher practically insisted. “If you want to sell books you need an audience and to do that you need Facebook. And Twitter. And….

Well I was already on Twitter, and had been for about a year. But I dragged my feet about Facebook because I didn’t care to post about sneezing or what I ate for lunch, or how I spilled my coffee or where the cat threw up. I really did NOT want to be involved in such a banal, trivial and cliché world. But I joined.

I kept my interactions simple and limited myself to general notes on weather, inspiration, book promotion, and things about writing. Took me a while to learn how to fill everything out and make it work. Than I learned about the ability to have a “page” and more learning commenced as I tried to build an author page (which is why I was there in the first place).

When I started to find familiar faces “out there,” I settled in with a little more confidence. I still kept my personal interactions to a minimum and never disclosed anything too personal. I’m still this way. But gradually I began to see the trouble with “social” media” and why the vagaries sent people away.

I wanted, and still sometimes want, to go away too.

Seems we’ve forgotten how to be civil. We don’t allow people to have a personal opinion that differs with ours. We have forgotten how to debate and be respectful of others’ ideas. We don’t approve of people who are different. We are self-centered and narcissitic. If we aren’t selfie-ing our friends to death, we are meme-ing ad nauseum or else we are selling and selling and selling and selling. It gets tiresome and exhausting and boring and did I mention tiresome?

Social media has made us antisocial (not everyone, of course, I speak generally here). It seems to have brought out the bigots, the racists, the homophobes, the misogynists, the anti-everyone, the social media platform builders and sellers, the buy-me-and-no-one-else-crowds and the folks who drowned out my Notifications with their posts of 57 new pictures every day.

What happened to being social? Where is the “how are you?” Where are the folks who are interested in you just for you? Where are the people who can share a little and then engage a lot?

It is no wonder that people are stressed about social media. It’s a madhouse of nasty innuendo, bad language, constant buy-buy-buy or sell-sell-sell, political vitriol (it has to do with who is #45), sickness, excuses and complaints. People are taking a break by the droves because the vagaries of social media are turning us into people we don’t like. 

Knowing this I wonder why we can’t be different, better, more social and stress a lot less?

Take a good hard look at your feeds. If you are a business, then sell. But remember to gain notice you have to be social too. Are you putting out a thousand pictures all over everyone’s feed? Stop. Give me 10 now and maybe 10 more later. I don’t need every single photo of your trip. Or else use the custom notifications and send only to those who really want to know the intimate details.

Yes, let us see the new baby, the new kitty, the graduation, the success, the bestseller, the solo at church, the blue ribbon and the first day of school. We are interested in your big moments. But exercise some caution before you get in too deep about your personal life. (And as a suggestion, stop broadcasting to the public when you are away from the house. Use the friends only for that and keep yourself safer). Sharing is caring. Too much sharing is overkill. Social media has become the overkill valley. No wonder we’re all wanting to run away back to the lives we know and love.

Let’s do a little less finger pointing, harassing, shaming and bullying. Let’s be SOCIAL and be kind. Let’s be curious and interested about others even though you want to yell “BUY MY BOOK.”  Remember that social media serves a purpose. It’s not a retail store (unless you have a business page). Want to get some fans? Be social before you be the salesperson.

And stop letting the vagaries of social media drive you, your friends, and me away because we need to stop stressing, worrying and recovering. Let’s be FUN! There’s a thought, right?

Let’s make Social media a social thing again and maybe we won’t trouble ourselves with the vagaries ever again.

I remain, Yours Between the Lines,

Sherry

Seasonal Changes and Mid-Year Review

The temperature may be 90 degrees outside and the A/C is definitely cranked down inside, but there are signs everything is about to switch over to a new season. I’m ready, are you?

(my house and I know we aren’t there yet, but hey…!)

When I was at the grocery store a few days ago, the magazines are touting “soups to warm you” and “easy casseroles for tailgating,” and snuggly quilts to make for those chilly nights. Covers display autumnal designs with pumpkins and warm colors of gold and orange. Domestic magazines are encouraging us to take our families on the ghost tours. In other words, Summer may have us firmly in her grasp but Autumn is pacing in the wings and she’s not far away.

Which is why I thought now was a good time to catch up with a mid-year review with what’s news and include what’s happened to be sure we’re ready for a change season.

UPCOMING NEW RELEASE: First, the July newsletter gave subscribers a first look at the new book cover! I followed this up with a release on Facebook, first on the Cover Me Darlings page and then on mine. Now you get to see the final front cover:

I’m completely crazed for this divine cover by Marisa-rose Wesley of Cover Me Darlings. The upcoming events are wonderfully captured. Hoping to for a SEP 21 RELEASE. No pre-order info yet.  If you want to be ready for the new book, then begin with the prequel, THE GYPSY THORN. Here’s a teaser and a link.
LATEST CHAT: I’ve done a Live Chat every month. Hope you’ve been listening. The latest one promised exclusive content for newsletter subscribers. August will begin those surprises. Catch up on the latest video here.  Newsletter subscribers can sign up here.

INSTAGRAM: Are you following all the pens I’ve been showing every Monday on Instagram? Here is the one for this week — you’re seeing it here the same time I’m posting on IG. Only two left after today. What a cool year of pens it has been. You can always scroll back through my IG and revisit them.

UPCOMING EVENT:  Find me next at Book ‘Em North Carolina, an author signing designed to fight against illiteracy. This will be my third time with them. The event is Sep 22, Robeson Community College, NC and the event is FREE. All you pay for are the books you buy. There are about 35 authors and publishers scheduled to attend. Plus there will be some panels and those are free too. Hope to see you. Here is the website with more info. Come by and mention this blog post and you’ll get a little something extra with my compliments.

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ON THE HORIZON: I was given a great idea and I am going to implement it right away. The suggestion was that I do some specialized videos about each of the books in my Evening Bower series, to include information about the characters plus read a snippet from each book. 

I like that idea and so I will begin this information right away! The first video will appear soon and be about Midnight Assassin. The second will be at the end of August and cover The Gypsy Thorn. The third will be about Time and Blood and appear around mid September. In the vids I will introduce you to characters, give you information about the plot and read something from the book. I will mention particulars about the characters that may enhance your experience with the story.

All this will be in preparation of the newest book’s release. Just before it comes out, I will do a teaser video (TBA) and mention some secrets that have never been discussed. Sound like fun?

Exact dates TBA in the newsletter, in here, and on my Facebook Author page. It’ll be FUN!

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There’s MORE!  FAN FICTION WRITERS!

My special book, Vampire Vignettes is planned for late spring 2019 (guessing). This book will be scenes that never made it into the regular novels of the Evening Bower. I have planned scenes between Drahomira and Franklin, Destin and Reaper, Rhea and Cooke…and so many more. But here’s where YOU come in.

I’m going to offer readers of the series a chance to have their fan fiction vignette INCLUDED in this book. You won’t be paid royalties when published, but you will have your own chapter in the back under Fan Fiction and you’ll be a published author too! Thinking right now up to three stories. More info on this coming.

If you have read the novels and plan to read the new book, then you will have all the information you need to do a fun vignette (of course I will happily answer any questions). Lighthearted is the key. They may be dark but they have to have some quirk to make me smile and must capture the established flavor and voice of the character. Look for specifics by the end of the month. I’m VERY excited about this and look forward to helping you out too.

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With the upcoming change of season, I’m changing too. I love the longer nights and the darker shadows.  New books keep me excited and the prospects ahead are as moonlight from a full moon. The changes make me want to write more….more….more!

Thank you for stopping by. Watch my newsletter and Facebook author page for updates, and of course, the Monday posts here. 

I remain always, Yours Between the Lines,

Sherry

Normally, I don’t like discussing religion and politics. I keep to mine and let others keep to theirs, mostly because of the controversy and vitriol the diversity tends to create. However, when it comes to writing, I don’t think writers should shy away from professing their beliefs. Not if the message is hopeful and encouraging. Not if lessons are learned or gained. Not if growth will be the result. If any of those reasons is the result of a controversial or important opinion or viewpoint, then you, the writer, are obligated to make a presentation, take a stand, and share your vision.

But let me be clear about one thing — I’m not for chest thumping issues. I believe in offering solutions for the majority. I believe in looking forward and not back. I do not believe in finger pointing, shaming or manipulating facts. To offer an opinion is one thing, but to offer something stronger, like change, requires intelligent and careful approaches. The bull in the china shop won’t work.

Why? Change is rarely if ever easy. Oh sure, we’ve all heard that before, but it is true. Let’s just look at the issue of the Confederate Flag. Now for me, I’ve never been a supporter. Mostly because I have read the history of the flag and know how it evolved and why (most people have not read anything about it but assume a great deal). For over a hundred years, many towns have had flags flying and monuments built but there has not been the kind of outcry as seen recently. No group, in previous and recent memory, stood on courthouse steps screaming at the top of their lungs to remove the statues, down the flag, or take it off the license plates. Only when a crazed killer waves a Confederate flag (he didn’t even espouse the Confederate beliefs, not the real ones), and kills nine people, that the world goes nuts and begins a kind of banishment and censorship that has risen to eyebrow breaking heights. And suddenly the pain of change begins. Whatever the reason, no matter how odd or rational or whatever, the painful transmutation begins where the world seeks betterment and plastic surgery.

There are such knee-jerk reactions to every major event. When a whole room of kindergarden children are attacked, when a massive number are killed in a nightclub, when a building is bombed or 60 women accuse a once family-friendly father figure of the most disgusting sexual abuse, when a child is selling lemonade without a permit, a black woman enters a white pool, or white police officer shoots a young black teen in the back, or when a lone gunman shoots down into a concert. The results from such incidents bring a cry for laws, justice — change.

Change hurts. Change shocks. Change excites. Change inspires. Change is new. Change is scary. Change is….life. Change is THE PLOT, writers.

Writers are instruments of change. We can move mountains when our words bring truth. Our truth can bring change and when used for positive reasons, we can do wondrous things. We can motivate and inspire, enliven and create. We can also scare, threaten, intimidate, command, demand, manipulate, and destroy. Lawmakers, politicians, pastors, teachers, parents, journalists,  all react and respond.

We writers have this power, too. 

We have power and we have obligation. Our stories, even our small ones, can contain instruments of change. Our lessons and our messages might be small or they may be blimpy, but you should exercise your power as a writer.

Don’t be one of those people who rise up only from opportunity. Make change a force that works always. Make change because it is right, has always been right, will continue to be right because it is a universal truth and must be repeated and shared. Make change a part of your life, one by which you can live every day. Be the power, the force, and the idea that is something better and more important than a bullet or a knife, or a flag, or an acerbic word.

As writers, we have a chance to do special things. With everything you write, every thought you present, it is your moment for lessons, for change, for enlightenment, for magic. Will you be like the Confederate Flag, a token of bygone values, of dead mores, of antipathy? Will you be the opportunist who urges change only when an incident makes your voice fortuitous?  Or will you be like the sun, rising glorious and steady, regular and necessary, honest and blunt, lighting the way?

Don’t worry whether or not others are reading or listening. Even a whisper in the dark can reach one soul. One thought can change a mind, one tear can give hope. Never run from offering honesty.

Change is hard but must happen for progress. Writers have a tool to help facilitate changes when they are needed. Write. Wisely chose the way you cut your words and change the world for the better.

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NEWS:  Wrapping edits on my new book, LOVE AND BLOOD. The cover IS FINISHED and I’m about to do a reveal. If you want a first look, be sure to sign up for my newsletter. Those folks will see the book cover before the public reveal.

And if you missed the latest LOVE AND BLOOD hint (on Facebook), here is the graphic with a picture highlighting the action in the book.

Thanks for stopping by.

I remain, Yours Between the Lines,

Sherry