12 IRKSOME WRITER COMMENTS 

Here are 12 comments said by “writers” that irk me and flip my switches! I’ll happily tell you why.

            1.  I don’t know what to write about/there’s nothing to write about.

WHAT? Seriously, folks. Life is a treasure trove of stories, both mundane and extraordinary. Begin in the moment….”I sat at the kitchen table staring out the window…” or “the coffee pot gurgled and I sighed as I poured my first cup. Monday’s. I hated them.” The possibilities are endless! I can’t empathize with anyone who says this to me.

2. What’s the deal with your vocabulary? Why do you say “stodgy” instead of “old-fashioned?” Why do you say “myriad” instead of “many?”

So why don’t you use those words? Why is your vocabulary so limiting and poor? As a writer, words are your craft, your money, your paint, your world. Words are like music. Why use a B flat instead of B? Maybe it sets the mood better? Or has the kind of melody needed for the moment or the character? Use words to their full advantage and don’t dumb down for people. Ever. Don’t know a word? Don’t expect the author to teach you. Go look them up!

3. I have writer’s block.

No. See #1.

4. I just want to write what I want to write and if people don’t like it, too bad.

Actually I don’t have a lot of trouble with that thought. In theory, it is excellent. In practice, it is horrible. You have to find the balance between what you like to write and what people want to read. If you publish some drivel that you enjoy and no one else does, why bother to publish it unless you just want something to put on your coffee table with your name on it? Don’t waste your money going through a publisher and all that if that is all you want. Just make a word document and go over to Kinko’s or someplace like that. But if you really want to publish, learn where your style fits and what’s already published. Then find your niche in the genre. There is always a way to blend and yet be unique in a crowd. Find it.

5. That is obscene. That is just porn. Well, I don’t write that crap. “Oh you write THAT stuff.”

Now now. There’s room for everyone. If you don’t like erotica or other racier forms of writing, then DON’T WRITE IT AND DON’T READ IT. But do not presume to be the moral or literary compass for everyone else. I don’t like BDSM and so I avoid certain kinds of books. But I will not stand for censorship. Books are there to share. Look at Madam Bovary, Lady Chatterley’s Lover, or even Harry Potter! All three are banned books. Are banned books. Should I tell you can’t read Harry Potter because some person’s religious sensibilities were offended? No, you write what you want but always be mindful that if you tread in turbulent waters not everyone will be anxious to ride your waves. Be accepting, consider your audience and move on.

6.  I want to be a writer but I don’t have time. Or I’d love to sit home all day and write.

First off, becoming a writer does not necessarily mean you sit home all day and write. Most people have lives that are busy with jobs, kids, hobbies, friends, troubles, and writing has to find a way in. However, writers make room for writing because they can do no less. Writers have learned they have to write. Writers look forward to that release, the expression, the exploration, the discovery that writing provides. There is ALWAYS TIME to write. No matter how busy you are, you have time. Do you go to lunch? Do you blog? Do you keep a diary or a journal? Do you read the paper with your coffee/tea/soft drink? Do you have 10 minutes at the end of your day when you play solitaire on your computer?

No matter your job or your family life, there are times you can program to write. Regular time. Every day. First in the day, last in the day, over a sandwich or instead of something else, but you can always put writing in your life. That is if you honestly WANT and NEED to. Sometimes it is easier to say you are a writer than to actually be one. Stop talking about it and be one. The daily/nightly practice will lead to a wish to write more. Trust me on this.

7. I don’t want to share what I’m working on because someone might steal my idea.

Really?? Are you so certain that you have a wholly original, hot idea that has never been done before and is so dynamic and wonderful that someone can make a best-seller out of it?? Then you better get an agent and get that thing published! And if it is that good, you should have no trouble finding an agent and a publisher, right?

Okay, back to planet Earth. It is improbable that your book/story idea is so darn hot that someone runs away with it. And they can only do that if you don’t finish what you start. Truly there are very few original ideas left. What people learn to do is take old stories and make them new by adding new twists or new characters. Stop worrying about who is going to rip you off and worry more about actually writing and finishing that project of yours. Then realize that you need to share it for proofreading. beta comments, and publishing. Stop thinking you are a phenom and just write, ok? (Unless you are a James Patterson, Stephen King or JK Rowlings prodigy, then what are you worried about?)

8. I’m afraid of what you’ll think when you read it. It’s my baby, you know. I want you to like it.

Anything created is a part of us. Painters, musicians, sculptors, writers….we create and give life to something we hope will be wonderful. Certainly approval is what we seek in sharing. But guess what? Approval comes later. First, learning the craft means critiques. Means criticism. Means suggestions for improvement. Means re-writes and it means – gasp – deletions. Folks, toughen up because any beta reader, editor, proofreader, formatter is going to tell you things that you don’t want to hear. And you have to be smart enough and savvy enough to take it, learn from it, and grow from it. Who among us has never been told our work needs work? Who hasn’t heard, “not for me, not our style, not up to our standards, not developed enough, not current, blah blah.” Or worse, “I read it and I didn’t really like it.” Hey, let’s keep it real. First, you are going to be edited to death. Live with it. Second, not everyone is going to “love” what you write. You write first for you and second for them. Not all of “them” are going to like “all of you.” So, be prepared and move on.

9. My editor says I need to delete this whole section. What the hell does he/she know? Its my story!

First, l hope you are working with a professional. And if so, then what he/she knows is legion compared to you. Second, a good editor will have two things in mind, to produce the best story and to produce a story that sells. If you are seeking to be published in a magazine the editor will want to make sure it is what the readers want and that it reads well. Experience is the teacher here. Listen and learn and yes, question, and then learn s’more. If you feel so violently that you know more than your editor and you cannot reach an understanding, then accept you won’t be published. That is the editor’s right and your lesson. That’s the breaks, kiddo. If you are publishing a book, your editor will have read the entire work and has an understanding of what works and why. Listen, learn, adapt and seek compromise once you have experience under your belt. If you are a greenhorn (a novice, an amateur, a first timer), you do not know more than your editor. If you feel you are being butchered, discuss it. Again if you think you know more/better than your editor you can pull you project. However, if you have learned your craft, and this is your submission after years of hard work, it will show in your writing. In most cases, your editor will have your best interest at heart but remember, their job is to make it right and make sure it sells. Remember that.

10. It is the story that matters, right? What is the big deal with looks and formatting? Who really cares?

I do. When it comes to Indie authors, there are two sides of this argument. One is that it is the story that counts and everything else is just stuff and nonsense. The other side is that your book is your name and reputation and should have a professional appearance that can stand up against any “traditionally” published book. This is one subject that I am anal about. If you are going to put a book in print, make sure you do it right. There are guidelines to follow on what a print book should and shouldn’t have inside. There are guidelines on how to make quality book covers. If you go through all the effort to write a superior story and have it edited, then make the book reflect your hard work. Invest in a cover that is better than your vacation photos. Make sure the copy on the cover is as well written and edited as diligently as the interior. Invest in a quality author photo, not one from your smartphone. Layout the book in accordance to the CMS (Chicago Manual of Style). Understand what front and back matter is expected to be there and where it is located. If you write fiction know what should NOT be included that maybe belongs in a non-fiction book, etc. Looks and formatting do count. When I pick up a book and I open it, I don’t want to see things that belong only in an ebook or to find links in a print book that are gobbledygook (itty bity links that mean nothing in print) or numbered blank pages, or “#” at the end of a chapter. Make your print book good enough to sit on a stand in the library! Don’t go cheap binding, tossed together formatting, sloppy or illegible fonts, etc. Your name is on the book. It reflects you. The story matters most of all. So dress it in the finery that it deserves. Don’t let me be able to tell the difference between your Indie book and a traditionally published one from Knopf or Tor or anyone else. First impressions DO COUNT, you know.

11. I’m afraid what I write won’t be any good.

I’m afraid. Those are the key words. Realize that you will always be your own worst critic and your worst enemy when it comes to your writing. Until you make peace with yourself and believe in you, you will have to learn to deal with the scaredy- cat in you. Truth is no matter how much I learn about writing and how many things I write, a part of me is always a little afraid that it won’t “measure up” or be any good. What I have to realize is if I give my best work then it most certainly will measure up. And if I continue to learn and improve I will stop feeling so much fear and learn to channel that fear into excitement and nervous anticipation. We fear because we know we are not prepared. We don’t like the unknown. Reduce those fears by arming yourself with a well-honed craft. A pen that writes with confidence that comes from a place of knowledge is a pen to be feared by others but not by you!

12. Finally – and I hear this ALL the time – I don’t have time to read much less write. Or I wish I had time to read AND write.  It’s write or read. I can’t do both.

Okay, now hear this. Great and prolific writers are great and prolific readers. To write well you MUST read. Voraciously. Your mind is improved by reading. Your vocabulary is improved. Your imagination is improved. Your idea bank is expanded. You learn what is being produced in your genre, what is selling and what you like and don’t like about it. You gain an understanding of plotting and characters and story rhythms. Example, I hear someone say, “oh it dragged in the middle.” And then when you say that their story is dragging in the middle, they understand. Or they have ideas on how to fix it. They “get it.” Comparatively speaking, such lessons are invaluable. If you don’t know what makes a good plot arc because you haven’t read any good books, then how do you expect to understand how to make yours flow? If You are told it lacks a dynamic element, will you understand? What have you read that can compare? Reading gives you a sense of good writing. It rubs off! All well-established, famous, prodigious writers read A LOT. So get with it. Make time. It is in the best interest of your inner inkwell. No more excuses — go read a book (or twelve). (Not sure what to read? I publish my book reviews here for those who are looking for good stuff).

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That’s my rant for today. Here are a few last tidbits.

GIVEAWAY in progress! Today is the last day to get in on my giveaway. Ten years ago I published my photography book and to celebrate the anniversary I’m giving away a HARDBACK copy of it – I Wish You Joy. It’ll cost you $47 on Amazon.

Go here and enter. Random winner!  ENDS AT NOON TODAY!!!

And don’t forget to check out the latest Fireside Chat video too. I was pretty off the chart. :)

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Getting down to my last pens on Instagram. With only about eight Monday’s worth of novelties left, don’t miss out on these last goodies. Check me out here.

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I’m about to release my upcoming book cover! If you subscribe to my Newsletter, you’ll get to see it first! What? You haven’t subscribed? Get on the list now!

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HAVE A VERY HAPPY FOURTH OF JULY! Be safe out there. Come back soon.

I remain, Yours Between the Lines,

Sherry

The Positive of Negative Emotions

…and how to use them for yourself and your characters.

Life is a study of emotions. We often cruise through our days, months and years, barely aware of what’s going on outside of ourselves, perhaps only peripherally aware of our neighbors, too aware of what the news offers, and oblivious to what goes on outside of our scope of interest. I put to you that being more aware of the emotional landscape in your world benefits you personally as well as your character writing — specifically, the negative emotions no one like to feel or discuss.

Authors love to delve into character backgrounds, researching history, culture, even underwear when it suits them (or they have a need to bare it all. Ahem). We will give characters seedy backgrounds, give them physical wounds, and even childhood issues, but few use the darker or more negative emotional wounds/issues to character benefit (unless creating villains). I believe this hurts our characters and handicaps us both as people and as storytellers.

Let me give you a few examples of negative emotions and how each benefits you and your writing when viewed positively.

GUILT:  We all know the dark side of guilt. We do or say something and suddenly we feel bad that we’ve caused harm, or tears. We didn’t mean to break the vase and feel guilty because we know we shouldn’t have been skating in the house. Mom is mad and we are guilty (and punished). So where is the gem here? Guilt proves that we have a conscience. Guilt is the other side of apathy. If we didn’t care, there is no guilt and that’s the true negative. Feeling guilty shows there is a moral compass that can be used over and over for a characters growth. Guilt for past deeds is fodder for actions in the future. Guilt is a foundation for relationships meant to be positive. Guilt is more than a one-and-done happening.

SHAME:  We feel badly when we do something which hurts others when we could have prevented it. We feel badly when we see others mistreated or used by someone else. Shame comes because we have learned what is and isn’t acceptable in speech or behavior or belief. It proves – and here is the positive – that we have a moral compass. Someone you love tells a  lie about someone else and you are ashamed of them. Your moral compass is pinging. It proves that you have learned that certain kinds of pain are wrong. The gift is that in feeling shame, you know how to find relief and pride. Shame can build character. Take a police officer who built a career on  a past shame and is now incorruptible.

ANGER: Being mad is one of those emotions that can be both good and bad. You’ve heard of “justifiable homicide?” Murder when the person had it coming? But what about simpler anger. Anger that is so deep that it ruins relationships. Such anger can test our moral compass, re: homicide. Hot anger seems like the unforgiveable negative but au contraire! Let us not forget Shakespeare’s warning, “Revenge is a dish best served cold.” In other words, let cooler heads prevail and when you have calmed down enact a revenge that the other never saw coming. So what’s the positive of anger? Anger demonstrats what your personal limits are and pushes you to test your moral compass. You reach the edge of your abyss and either you fall in or you step back. For a character to discover that edge gives them a wonderful control of self. And a useful tool against others who seek to manipulate, too. Use anger carefully.

FEAR: We all know about “fight or flight” syndrome and how fear will motivate or paralyze. The negative part of fear is becoming insecure. Fear can still thrust a soldier into battle or paralyze them into being shot. Fear is deadly. The upside to fear is how it creates change. Overcoming fear can break inhibitions or create new ones. Coming to grips with fear also teaches a person to trust personal instincts. And good instincts are a character’s gem. Use fear to make positive change and memorable, useful, experiences.

GRIEF: If you’ve lost a childhood friend, a family pet, a relative or cried over a character in a book or a movie, you’ve known grief. The level of attachment defines the depth. And that depth is the positive aspect we need for greater characters. Without grieving, we are shallow, septic, apathetic and even anti-social. Grief is the obvious truth of caring. Grieving is change, development, growth for relationships, a mantra for change. The mother who lost four children due to miscarriages gives up having any children and stops having sex because of a fear of more losses. The grief has changed her entire outlook of sex, relationships, her abilities and her function in life. And suddenly an abandoned child is thrust into her life and she needs bone marrow….and we have a match. Now the moral fiber opens and so does a heart. Grief can make positive changes when carefully managed.

These are only a few examples of how we need to use the positive side of negative emotions. Using this method to peel away the sour, provides special depth to characters and makes them unforgettable and more like real people. We need to find positives in the negatives for ourselves too, and if we don’t know how, then begin with characters. You’ll find your way by learning through them, just as your readers will.

Happy Writing!

Don’t forget to join me for my next Facebook Live chat on May 26, 11 a.m. on my author page.

Want to be in the know before others? Sign up and receive my monthly newsletter for giveaways, first looks, sneak peeks and sales.

I remain, Yours Between the Lines,

Sherry

What Mother’s Day Offers Writers

Yesterday was Mother’s Day. I lost my mom over a decade ago and the loss never truly goes away. I thought of her and deeply missed her. And, as I often do, I thought about writing and how my loss – and the emotions attached to that loss – could relate to my characters. Am I fully using my experiences? Do I include these emotions or tap into them for maximum impact in my writing?

The answer in this case is no, not really. In my poetry, I have written about and delved into loss, like this:

“Love isn’t only what we have while we’re alive.
It’s the strength we’re given to stay behind,
and say goodbye.”
-from “Last Lessons,” in Paper Bones by Sherry Rentschler (c) 2013 

But what have I done with my emotions that benefits my creative writing? I must respond by admitting that my fiction has not benefitted. Yet.

This then is the perfect time to examine what the loss of a mother (or any family member) brings to your writing repertoire and what you can do with your experience. It’s all about writing what you know, yes? This is the perfect holiday to take advantage.

In life, we have relationships with our mothers that go from blissfully solid to teenage terrible, from retrospective to lonely, to bordering on abuse or even murderous. Each person has within them a myriad of emotions that are useful, necessary, and invaluable to your writing. Do you use the “mother influence” to challenge or grow your character? Does the mother offer insight into the current state of being for your character? Does the holiday set your character up for laughter or sorrow? Are you a modern mother or a retro one?

Real examples can highlight the character emotions and moveyou from telling into showing. Baking together, learning to sew or cook, going to work with, sharing a business, teaching moments, playtime, each and every single experience adds depth to characters. Don’t forget simple things like making a lunch, giving a handmade gift, or simply sitting in the grass and watching the ants go by.

In the death of a mother, we can find regrets for things unsaid or undone, or worse, for things we did say or do. Death sadly provides an opportunity to discover unexplainable lost treasures in the home or in the mail. We discover secrets of personalities that never manifested when the mother was living. We know emptiness, frustration, fear, separation, as well as relief and joy. Our every sense is engaged. The lingering smell of perfume or stale flowers. The soft favorite sweater left on a chair. The many pictures lining the buffet or the dresser. Favorite movies highlighted in the TV guide. Homemade jam in the refrigerator.

Again, take the time to show character through activities related to the mother. Going through a jewelry box after a funeral, opening leftover mail, finding an old journal, speaking to siblings or other secondary family members, even neighbors offers insight. Use reality to spark life to the moment.

The how and why of each and all these various feelings are important to your writing. You can examine what you feel by giving your characters outlets to express them for you. You’ve heard the expression to “discover what scares you and write that.” Familial holidays set up this scenario perfectly.

In my case, I’ve realized that I have not used the mother influence to its best advantage. I am now writing fiction where my character became a mother and is facing a vault of new emotions. Though I am not a mother myself, I have a role model in my mom that gives me all the fodder I need. And I have the loss of my parent(s) to fill in the emotions I must experience for true-to-life drama. 

Yes, loss requires I go deep and refresh old, painful memories and feelings. Yes, it is going to hurt to go there. And I believe that doing so will give my writing a truth the readers will relate and respond to because I dared to write it. My daring will allow my readers to feel enabled to go with me and perhaps tap into their private emotions too.

On a lighter note, I hope you and your families all enjoyed a Happy Mother’s Day. I hope you had another chance to express your love, give a hug, share a token of affection. Take none of those free moments for granted lest they be gone forever and you lose your chance.

But if you spent the day in memory and reflection, if you wandered into a cemetery or visited a grave (even in your mind), I hope the emotions were touchable and brought you happy tears.

Please use what you have to give life and breath to your characters. Be bold, be honest, be real. Your characters have/had mothers too. Do not let an opportunity to understand them pass us by.

RESULTS OF THE FREE EDITING OFFER:

Last month during my Fireside with the Phoenix live chat, I offered viewers of the chat, receivers of my newsletter, and members of my street team, a chance to have free editing for any writing project. I was excited to be able to make this offer and I hoped to read some very wonderful pieces and forward something exciting to an editor/friend, maybe even discover a fresh, new writer.

Unfortunately not a single person participated in this free offer. Initially I was sad and dejected and then I had to shake my head. Never, ever in my years as a writer have I ever been offered a chance at FREE editing. Had I received the chance, you can bet your bottom dollar that I would have JUMPED on such an opportunity. 

I understand you may not have thought my offer worthy or even a good deal. I assure you that it was. My hope is that you may find another chance at a like gift in the future. Sadly, I will not be offering this giveaway again.

Finally, look for my next Facebook Live Chat on May 26. And the monthly newsletter will be headed out a few days after. Have you signed up yet? There’s a link on the right….

Thanks for stopping by!
I remain, Yours Between the Lines,

Sherry