Happy New Year’s Eve

Memories or Mysteries for 2019

Well, here we are. Another year dissolves as we gather together on the last day of 2018. This year has been a tumultuous one for the world, our country, and most of us personally. Because of the year’s upheaval, I stepped back and took a long look at how I approached each new year. I would make the expected and proverbial “resolutions” and then watch as they died during the year. Usually forgotten, mostly abandoned, often supplanted by other ideas. My approach never worked. 

Then I learned to stop making resolutions. Instead, about a decade ago I decided to make GOALS. These didn’t have to have timelines like “Lose 10 lbs a month.” What a goal did was to help me identify projects and then I established timelines to meet those projects based on my personal abilities. I began to succeed. Just look at my published resume. But my personal resume didn’t seem as successful. 

I learned that having goals wasn’t enough. I needed a way to channel my energy. Some way to help direct my thoughts. One year it was POWER. One year it was INSPIRATION. The better the word, the more I felt purpose, the harder I worked on my goals.

Basically I learned from my life that with every New Year’s Eve I had a choice. Either I could spend my tine evaluating the past, looking back and trying to fix what I didn’t do, or where I didn’t go, or meet the people I neglected. OR I could face forward and approach the future without expectations and with goals in hand. Yes, the future would be an unknown but if I prepared with a strong word and good goals, I could meet any challenge.

That’s the key. Do you spend your time looking back or looking forward? Looking back is the Road of Memories. Looking forward is the Road of Mysteries. 

I’m choosing Mystery. 

And my word for this year? FOCUS. I’m focusing on my personal self. As I’ve already said in my last Fireside chat (you can watch it here), my first priority will be me. I need to get healthy and the first part of that word is HEAL. So I will work to heal the parts of me that are aching (a bad knee and surgical recovery). And once I heal then I start my road to being healthy. I’m not going to say “lose x pounds” because I’m going to lose weight by opting to change my life to be healthier. The rest takes care of itself. 

See how it works? No more self-stress or self-imposed resolutions. No more setting self up for failure. Now I will succeed because health and healing come first. As long as I FOCUS, that will happen and my personal self will improve. Hint: Write it down and leave it for yourself in every room. Put it on the fridge, in the writing room, in the bathroom, on your nightstand, in your purse or attached to your laptop. Let the word become your mantra for the year and become it. This really WILL help you!

Professionally, I have three key projects for the year. I’m dedicated to them. If more are possible, then great! But I have my FOCUS and my GOALS and I’m surging ahead with them in mind. The mystery of “COMING SOON” will carry me through to completion. Excited yet?  More on those soon!

I welcome the mystery of what completion of my goals will bring to me. And I’m not going to worry if people don’t agree, do more, do less, approve or disapprove. The only thing that matters is that I stay true to my course and am happy with my personal success.

That’s what I recommend for you – a word to channel your energies. And goals without unrealistic stress.

To that end, I hope we will be together during the next year. I hope you will join me on this mysterious journey called Life. Remember to sign up for my newsletter and join my Evening Bower Fan/Readers group. I am doing giveaways and telling secrets ONLY to those two groups for now.

Here’s to a Joyous and Productive, personally satisfying New Year! Thank you! And I’ll see you somewhere Between the Lines…

Sherry

What Mother’s Day Offers Writers

Yesterday was Mother’s Day. I lost my mom over a decade ago and the loss never truly goes away. I thought of her and deeply missed her. And, as I often do, I thought about writing and how my loss – and the emotions attached to that loss – could relate to my characters. Am I fully using my experiences? Do I include these emotions or tap into them for maximum impact in my writing?

The answer in this case is no, not really. In my poetry, I have written about and delved into loss, like this:

“Love isn’t only what we have while we’re alive.
It’s the strength we’re given to stay behind,
and say goodbye.”
-from “Last Lessons,” in Paper Bones by Sherry Rentschler (c) 2013 

But what have I done with my emotions that benefits my creative writing? I must respond by admitting that my fiction has not benefitted. Yet.

This then is the perfect time to examine what the loss of a mother (or any family member) brings to your writing repertoire and what you can do with your experience. It’s all about writing what you know, yes? This is the perfect holiday to take advantage.

In life, we have relationships with our mothers that go from blissfully solid to teenage terrible, from retrospective to lonely, to bordering on abuse or even murderous. Each person has within them a myriad of emotions that are useful, necessary, and invaluable to your writing. Do you use the “mother influence” to challenge or grow your character? Does the mother offer insight into the current state of being for your character? Does the holiday set your character up for laughter or sorrow? Are you a modern mother or a retro one?

Real examples can highlight the character emotions and moveyou from telling into showing. Baking together, learning to sew or cook, going to work with, sharing a business, teaching moments, playtime, each and every single experience adds depth to characters. Don’t forget simple things like making a lunch, giving a handmade gift, or simply sitting in the grass and watching the ants go by.

In the death of a mother, we can find regrets for things unsaid or undone, or worse, for things we did say or do. Death sadly provides an opportunity to discover unexplainable lost treasures in the home or in the mail. We discover secrets of personalities that never manifested when the mother was living. We know emptiness, frustration, fear, separation, as well as relief and joy. Our every sense is engaged. The lingering smell of perfume or stale flowers. The soft favorite sweater left on a chair. The many pictures lining the buffet or the dresser. Favorite movies highlighted in the TV guide. Homemade jam in the refrigerator.

Again, take the time to show character through activities related to the mother. Going through a jewelry box after a funeral, opening leftover mail, finding an old journal, speaking to siblings or other secondary family members, even neighbors offers insight. Use reality to spark life to the moment.

The how and why of each and all these various feelings are important to your writing. You can examine what you feel by giving your characters outlets to express them for you. You’ve heard the expression to “discover what scares you and write that.” Familial holidays set up this scenario perfectly.

In my case, I’ve realized that I have not used the mother influence to its best advantage. I am now writing fiction where my character became a mother and is facing a vault of new emotions. Though I am not a mother myself, I have a role model in my mom that gives me all the fodder I need. And I have the loss of my parent(s) to fill in the emotions I must experience for true-to-life drama. 

Yes, loss requires I go deep and refresh old, painful memories and feelings. Yes, it is going to hurt to go there. And I believe that doing so will give my writing a truth the readers will relate and respond to because I dared to write it. My daring will allow my readers to feel enabled to go with me and perhaps tap into their private emotions too.

On a lighter note, I hope you and your families all enjoyed a Happy Mother’s Day. I hope you had another chance to express your love, give a hug, share a token of affection. Take none of those free moments for granted lest they be gone forever and you lose your chance.

But if you spent the day in memory and reflection, if you wandered into a cemetery or visited a grave (even in your mind), I hope the emotions were touchable and brought you happy tears.

Please use what you have to give life and breath to your characters. Be bold, be honest, be real. Your characters have/had mothers too. Do not let an opportunity to understand them pass us by.

RESULTS OF THE FREE EDITING OFFER:

Last month during my Fireside with the Phoenix live chat, I offered viewers of the chat, receivers of my newsletter, and members of my street team, a chance to have free editing for any writing project. I was excited to be able to make this offer and I hoped to read some very wonderful pieces and forward something exciting to an editor/friend, maybe even discover a fresh, new writer.

Unfortunately not a single person participated in this free offer. Initially I was sad and dejected and then I had to shake my head. Never, ever in my years as a writer have I ever been offered a chance at FREE editing. Had I received the chance, you can bet your bottom dollar that I would have JUMPED on such an opportunity. 

I understand you may not have thought my offer worthy or even a good deal. I assure you that it was. My hope is that you may find another chance at a like gift in the future. Sadly, I will not be offering this giveaway again.

Finally, look for my next Facebook Live Chat on May 26. And the monthly newsletter will be headed out a few days after. Have you signed up yet? There’s a link on the right….

Thanks for stopping by!
I remain, Yours Between the Lines,

Sherry

A couple years ago (3 Jun 15) I read an insightful (and humorous) blog post by Julie Butcher from her personal blog Fire Drill (fabulous writer/author/columnist, if you are wondering, and it got me thinking. Julie writes that today’s authors need to consider what is current for teens when writing YA. Thirty years ago, teens didn’t do coffee the way they do now (even down to the ten-years old though I wouldn’t allow that, still..). Today’s youth truly are more health conscious despite all the overweight people in the world (me included), and they are reading labels and worried about GMOs and being “gluten-free.” Thanks for the reminders, Julie.

After I considered how much I hate intrepidly healthy people (just kidding! Maybe.), I thought about the reverse of what Julie said. I’m a boomer and I know many young people who are writing about other generations in their stories. Some are doing biographies while others are penning family histories. The point is, depending on the decade, things were very different when I was a kid, teen, and young adult. 

But how much effort is being given to the truth in building a culture in newer books?

For example, I heard on the news that Affirmed won the Triple Crown, gas was 91 cents. The big win was 1978. But just ten years earlier, gas was averaging only 34 cents! And a stamp was a nickel. It certainly alters perspective, right?

I was discussing the new cell phones with a young college woman (20 years old) and she asked me about my first cell phone. I laughed and told her about the “shoe size bricks” that were phones. And then I really floored her when I mentioned the “bag phone” we had in the late ’80s. It sat on the floor, on the “hump” in our car, right where the big plush bench seat separated so each of us could adjust our own. She was still reeling from shock I think because she said, “hump on the floor?” Ah the cars of yesterday! Something else to consider, yes? Those late 80’s don’t seem that far away to me because I remember them, but to her my world might as well be a separate galaxy.

Much was written of the early rock festivals. Take Woodstock, historical and beloved. There were no cell phones. There were no tablets. There were no Bluetooth devices or iPods.  Woodstock was 1969. The first Walkman – a fabulous portable cassette with foamy headphones, didn’t happen for another decade on July 1, 1979.

In keeping with what Julie mentioned, let’s talk coffee and food. Historians believe the first recorded coffee-house was in Constantinople, Turkey in 1475. So coffee isn’t a new thing. Starbucks, however, is. Coffee houses or coffee shops really didn’t “develop” into a conscious thing in the US until about 1990 (though it was in the more artsy places like SoHo, San Francisco, and New Orleans earlier).  Starbucks opened one shop in 1971 in Seattle (where many think the coffee craze started). I consider the coffee craze a part of the boomer experience, “boomerly” speaking.

But let’s go back a little further. I grew up in the Midwest on corn-fed beef and potatoes. As kids, we ran everywhere, pretty much without fear of anything. My town wasn’t small but it was a town and not a city. Still, we didn’t have gang violence, drive by shootings, drug dealer corners, or worry about being abducted, at least not in abundance or where we were restricted. People got their mail at the house from a mailman who walked. Newspapers were delivered to the porch (or the flowers if the aim was bad) by kids on bikes, kids walked to school when they could (because many could!). My first experience with a school bus wasn’t until I hit 8th grade. By then I was in Florida and in a more subdivision environment. We rode bikes to school in the 6th and 7th grade because that was accepted and gave us freedom. No one worried about us being stolen or killed. And that was only in 1966-1968.

But back to food. Sonic drive ins have been around since 1959. I never saw any until I was an adult but there were many “copies” around, perfect hangouts for dates. Drive-in’s were big when I was a teen and young adult. Movie theaters had balconies and you could smoke. We did. Theaters were where movies were shown and plays were performed. And balconies didn’t cost extra either.

At home, we didn’t eat wrap sandwiches and yogurt smoothies. We ate soft creamy ice cream or frozen custard, snow cones and Nutty Buddies. We bought hot dogs and hamburgers loaded with everything, the messier the better. Anyone remember Burger QUEEN?  And no popcorn was worth eating unless loaded with butter and salt. We ate red meat — meatloaf, sloppy joes, spaghetti with meat, meatballs, hamburger, steak (might be flank or flat-iron but it was steak).

No one read labels because there weren’t labels like there are today. That is an innovation of the last decade. No one really cared. Ever.

And no one I went to school with had a peanut allergy. PB&J sandwiches (peanut butter and jelly) were readily shared! Oh, and no backpacks. We carried all our books (lockers didn’t come until junior high and then we still carried to class), and our wee metal lunch boxes with thermos! Sandwich, box of raisins, apple, milk (no bags of chips, though sometimes I did get a bag of peanuts).

The point is, as Julie Butcher mentions, “Pay attention to the world.” Stay current with today’s inventions and trends if you are writing YA. If you are writing about young adults 30-40 years ago, understand the world and culture of that decade or century. If you want to write historical novels about the last fifty years, then realize how very different the times and people were. Even language can date you if you are writing lots of dialogue (and I know you are). Neato, groovy, cool, hip, man. Super, jelly-o, and jeez!

If you are an older writer creating YA characters today, be careful not to let your memories of “back then” become the world of your characters of today. And likewise, if you are a younger writer (40 years old and less), be careful not to let modernisms muddy up a retro, antique or vintage story.

Know your world. Mine, theirs, yours. You dig? Jeah (not a misspelling)! And your stories will shine brighter for your efforts. Your characters will be memorable, too.

(Thanks Julie Butcher)
I remain, Yours Between the Lines,
Sherry