WHY WE MEMORIALIZE TODAY

Today is Memorial Day. For some, it will be just another holiday that includes swimming, picnics, grilling in the backyard, sports binging, or a lazy day with a cold drink and a good book.

Whatever your activity this year, please take a moment and reflect on the reason why you have the freedom to do as you please.

Today, we remember the men and women who sacrificed their lives in the military service of their country. Today, their shadow falls over us and protects us from the vilest forms of oppression, injustice, and slavery. Their deaths mean we live free.

I understand we are a suffering people. And socially, we have much to learn and need many adjustments to find better days. But the shadow I speak of allows you the ability to complain about a leader without going to jail. It allows you to wake up without having to put on a gas mask and sling a weapon on your shoulder before going outside. The shadow of spilt blood allows you to worship where you wish and with whom you wish. The shadow of many men and women are the security blanket to the life we live in this country, and with the greatest amount of protections and freedoms than enjoyed anywhere else in the world.

Wars were fought all over the world. Men died in the jungles, in the sands, in the streets, on the oceans and in the air, against many kinds of aggressors. And forgetting our political beliefs for the reason soldiers were deployed there, the point is they stayed and they fought and they were valiant and they died believing in one simple truth — that we, and this country, were worth it.

No, I’m not going to be naïve and say that we don’t have issues in this country. There are home grown and international terrorists who lurk in the very shadows that rest over us. We have “leadership” with questionable moral fiber and a systemic national misogyny thankfully but slowly going up in smoke under the #MeToo movement. We have African American, Hispanic, Asian and Native American people who are fighting prejudice and wrongful deaths as well as cultural persecution. We have gangs and drugs and legal fighting over abortions and border walls and immigration.

We are not perfect.

Some would say certain among us aren’t truly free.

I say they are wrong. I’ve been to other countries and I’ve seen what happens to those who speak out, who step out of line, who dare to use the freedoms that Americans have and they don’t. I know the jails where the lead paint peels from walls, where the dirt floor hides the scorpion skeletons, and the threat of death is real in a worship-our-way-or-die country. The other side of the fence isn’t greener. It’s swampy and stinks and is filled with smothering terrorism, cultural and societal fetters, chains that will force people into a daily life on its knees.

We are not them.

So while you watch sports and debate with your family over whether or not to take a knee, if you think that teachers (the hardest working advocates for our children) should not get a pay raise, if you argue about feminism (not really understanding what it is), or why English and American Anglicans are not the same, then do so with an appreciation and a respect that your freedom to complain and debate allows to you.

Then be grateful for and protective of that freedom. You can say what you like (as long as it is respectful and appropriate to the situation), you can own a gun, you can watch whatever silly news media you like and read whatever book you wish. You can take pictures of your trip or write a blog and complain. You can file a lawsuit or be a man and marry your male lover. You can go to the pool or the bowling alley, or skating rink or whatever kind of parade you want, and you can check out a movie, eat meat or fish or drink alcohol or clean water. You can be a woman and shoot a gun or be a man and mother and father children.

You are free. And you are because of the continued sacrifices by the brave men and women in the military who died so you could freely complain about how miserable your life is. Please take a moment to enter the military section of your local graveyard and give a moment of silent respect to the fallen. Most of them died willingly for the only thing they clearly understood. that is freedom over tyranny. Each and every one of our fallen made us “the land of the free and the home of the brave.” Let us cherish that which they died to provide.

Have a safe Memorial Day and God Bless America.

Proud to be a non-combat veteran, I remain, Yours Between the Lines,

Sherry

The Necessity of The Little Things

Happy May! Hard to believe it’s already a week into the month. Time does seem to fly faster as I get older. Often it feels as though I barely begin a project when the deadline jumps in my lap. Does this happen to you?

Every year, some of the same events push forward on the calendar – award nominations, author book conferences, marketing/publicity renewals – and often interfere with what I want to be doing and that’s working on my writing. But these annual calendar events are important to your work and require the same attention as that fight scene your working on in the novel. However, sometimes it can feel overwhelming and chaotic unless you are organized.

I confess I’m not always organized at home. Cleaning can be delayed, supper can run late, laundry gets pushed a day, grocery shopping forced early….daily stuff can push my buttons. But I plan for those things so why shouldn’t I plan for my other work, the Writer Job?

My Brain, the Calendar

I’m a child of the desktop Daily Calendar (remember those huge things that covered your desk and became your blotter and your doodle pad?) as well as ye good ol’ Pocket Calendar. Both were used to some degree but neither worked as well as intended. Then along came that hand held monstrosity called the PDA or some other kind of electronic organizers. Or if you pre-date those, you will remember the thick leather binders with calendars, daily to do lists, task lists, contacts, notepapers, and various other organizers in one THICK binder called a Life Planner or Organizer. Big with the old “Yuppie” crowds and young up-and-coming executives. Steal that and you could break a person because it held their entire professional life. It’s why we needed the cloud!

Today, after much trial and error, I keep a 5×7 size daily calendar with a monthly overview and I use it. That’s point number one. I like a physical one that I can refer to any time and that does not depend on my being on the computer. There is room for daily notes as well as a monthly overview for a quick glance of scheduled events. I am religious about this thing! I write personal appointments (nails, hair, visits) but mostly I use it for

     1. Writer events (writer group meetings, meetings with PAA, library visits, phone calls I need to make)
     2. Appearances (conferences, interviews [radio, newspaper, blogs])
     3. Deadlines for marketing and promotion by month plus when announcements/results are announced (applying for book awards, starting an ad campaign, working for cover designs, preparing for oral reviews or scheduling book edits) to be sure paperwork is done on time/money is paid, etc.
     4. Family appointments that may overlap on scheduled dates.

Keeping organized is the key to maintaining control of your life and sanity. My calendar helps me to do this.

Organization – The File Folder

I’m a paper copy person. I have digital files of everything (cloud, flash drive, DVD, CD) but I also have paper copies of every story, poem, published and unpublished novel, notebooks of ideas (quotes, pictures, stories concepts, character sheets). And I maintain folders.

     1. Clips of my published works (articles published in newspaers, magazines and blogs)
     2. Copies of articles about me by others (newspapers, magazines, blogs)
     3. Public appearances to include my speeches, copies of programs, financial stipends, etc
     4.  Press Releases (yes you need to do one every time you publish or win an award)
     5. Expenditures for marketing, promotions, subscriptions, book orders, anything that I spent money on – and I have subset folders to help me if I spend a great deal.
     6. Award applications AND expenditures
     7. Earnings by month and a yearly overview (include stipends, honorariums, royalties)

Don’t forget your folders for different books in progress, stories, research (I have tons of folders with stuff I’ve looked up).

And correspondence files. Hard copies of important contact letters, contracts, etc that might need quick reference/proof.

It is a digital world with a paper underbelly. It’s proved invaluable over the years.

Miscellaneous Important Things

Business Cards – If you go to any event where you meet other authors or any industry professionals (models, designers, photographers, publishers, editors) I hope you are picking up business cards besides all that free swag. When you get home, be sure to put those business cards into your digital rolodex if you keep such a thing. Or if you are like me, I have a card folder. One for authors and one for local businesses I like and out of town ones I want to revisit. Contact cards can be useful when you need help or plan an event.

Last suggestion. At the end of every work week (you decide how you monitor your work). I use Saturdays to evaluate the past week, organize the leftovers, make notes for the next week, make the requisite lists that seriously resemble “to do.” Post-Its are my friend.

The little things matter and losing touch with them can cause you to feel frayed and disjointed. Managing those little things – or as an old mentor said, “juggling feathers in a hurricane” – will make you feel (and be) more in charge and in control of the bigger things. After all, we are the bigger things and we are our personal, best managers.

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Hope you notice the recent updates to the web pages, including the books. More changes to come.

Thanks for stopping by!
I remain, Yours Between the Lines,

Sherry

SAFETY TIPS for the OVER 50 Crowd (writers, too)

I am not deliberately writing this to be man when I tell you that many of the authors I’ve met who are over 50 are out of shape, me included. Boomers are the worst when it comes to taking care of ourselves (me, again) because we read and write and therefore we sit more than we do anything else. We know we need to do more but hey, we eat while we write (and drink). Although many of us are now trying to eat less chocolate and more kale (not me), the fact remains that we are out of shape. 

And it’s not just authors, but the Baby Boomer Generation is the new, largest generation. And no matter what our individual positive and negative traits, we are a generation older and out of shape and therefore more prone to personal accidents and injury. We are children of our times.

If you’re like me, you grew up on red meat and potatoes. Hamburger, hot dogs, sloppy joes, creamed corn, creamed chip beef, gravies, biscuits, toast, corn cereal (rice crispies anyone?) French fries, fish sticks, meatloaf, spaghetti and meat sauce, meat, meat, meat and starch starch starch. Don’t forget Vienna sausages and Spam. Sure,I had salads too, served along with friend chicken. The only fish in my house was breaded and in a stick. And I’m overweight (struggled all my life, even in the military). Diet has a lot to do with what happens now in my present and future. 

I mention it because authorship/writing/sedentary research/reading contributes to my reason for this article. But so does age. Combine the two and you need some tips to keep you from ending up in the hospital (after someone posts a video of you on AFV). Yes, we know how to eat better now, but we still have half a century of lessons to overcome. That doesn’t happen easily or overnight.

So here are some tips to mitigate accidents while you change your habits, lose the weight, or just age gracefully:

Remember these three things as we discuss safety: You are older and you lose strength and balance as you age. Unless you work it, your “core” muscles that support your every moment go flabby and you don’t have the strength to stop certain mishaps. And finally, blood pressure is a concern as we age, often impacted by other factors (disease, medicine, age, and carelessness).

THE BATHROOM:

1. The shower and tub can be scary places if you fall and are alone. First, if you bend over to wrap your hair, go slowly. Many have tumbled forward due to loss of balance and blood rushing to the head. Instead, lean your butt against the back of the shower with weight on your heels. Wrap your head and then rise up slowly. The solid wall behind you will give you a focus. Also, never contort or bend in the shower with your back to the curtain or to the doors (especially glass). Should you slip and go backwards, well, it will be a terrible accident.2. Hand rails are your friends. Nothing wrong with giving yourself an aid. Install a handrail (no plastic or PVC – get bronze or chrome over steel) at waist level. So that the average person in the shower (sorry all you people 6 feet tall and over), reaches with a slightly bent elbow at waist level. Should there be a slip, you have something real and firm to grasp that won’t pop out of the wall. 

3. If you do fall out of the shower/tub, be sure to have a cell phone or land line available. Don’t leave it in the other room or up on the counter ten feet away. I put mine right outside the shower. If I’m on the floor (I’ve fallen and can’t get up) then I want to be able to reach a phone with minimum crawling in case I’m seriously hurt.

THE STAIRS

l. Most people over 50 who are out of shape still think they can run down stairs like they are 20. If you exercise and are lithe, yes you can. If not, well, let me tell that you can fall at any age for any reason but stairs will do you in as you age. First, your eyes and your glasses! Bifocals change everything about what you see below the nose. When I first got my bifocals I had a hard time adjusting to lowering my head enough to continue normal vision. As a result I did take a tumble down stairs, twice. Once only three steps but I landed on my hip on a concrete floor. Ouch! The other fall came on marble stairs when I did even see the step because I caught it in my glasses “blind spot.” I tumbled down six stairs before I caught myself. Fortunately, only my pride took a bruising. Glasses, combined with a weak center core will contribute to falling.

2. The weak center core (your stomach muscles) cause you to have less control over your body. And it also adds to bad posture. If you don’t stand up straight when you take stairs (especially going down) you force your body to lean more forward than it should. If your core is strong, your body will compensate. If not, hello tumble. Good posture also gets forfeit by writers who lean over when they should sit up straight to type, type while leaning over or laying flat in the bed. Hunchback over a keyboard (shoulders not pushed back), neck bent, also weakens the core and bad posture means less control of the body. 

3. Shoes matter. The higher the heel, the less steady you will be. If you are wearing stilletoes, then be elegant and cautious and glide slowly. Be the queen. Don’t go chomping down the stairs like a horse on rails. You will fall.

I know, seems crazy, but add years of this behavior and you have a recipe for a serious injury waiting to happen.

3. The stair solution is simple. Use the handrail. Don’t speed down the stairs as if you were 20 again. Strengthen yourself by walking on a treadmill and lean on the rails or even use one while walking. Learn to walk without assistance and Stand. Up. Straight. Eyes forward. Don’t hunch or bend over to read while trying to walk. Seriously, don’t do it with your cell in real life so don’t do it while on the treadmill.

4. I’m going to add stepladders and step stairs as an additive. Going to fix something in the house or yard and need the ladder? Get one with rails. If you aren’t used to cleaning the gutter, don’t suddenly decide to climb the 16 foot ladder and start reaching wide up high. 

Rule of thumb, if you haven’t done this in the last two months or less, don’t do it now. Some deeds are NOT like riding a bike. Your body does NOT remember and you don’t maintain muscle memory for something that you used to do 30 or 40 years ago!

Which brings me to the last category:

PLAY

You’ve decided you want to play along with your teens or your grandkids. Or else you’re out with “the girls” or “the friends” and you go somewhere where your “professional peers” are doing things that look like great fun. You want in! Problem is they are 20 years younger than you or it’s something they’ve done many times in the recent pass and you haven’t done it since junior high. Like:  

Wanna ride your kid’s mountain bike down the dirt hill? Or how about using the pogo stick? Feel like racing down the street? Climbing the jungle jim? Rock wall? Roller skates? So I’m going to ask you how long it’s been and do you have on the right shoes?? Have you been drinking? And are you nuts?

I’m not saying don’t have fun or don’t stay young. If you want to do wild and crazy things then get in better shape by improving your center of gravity and making sure your shoes, your glasses, and your clothes aren’t going to get you into trouble. Flip flops may be comfortable but they aren’t secure. Bifocals help you to read but aren’t great when you are climbing. Dresses aren’t for rock walls or strolls through the brush due to brambles, poison ivy or things that bite. See my point?

Safety requires change as we age. We aren’t who we used to be. We can be close if we work at it. If not, and you just want to live your life, then do it gracefully, smartly, and think before you act. Remember that healing also takes more time than it did when you were twenty. And hips and knees are expensive if surgery is required. Save your money and take some tips.

The characters in our books may survive going over the cliff, but your odds? Well, let’s work on that core first and oh, don’t forget to change your shoes.

Thanks for coming by. Here’s to a safer, healthier summer while we write our bestsellers.

Yours Between the Lines,
Sherry